Content and Conversation aka Word Vomit

V. Oooh, how mysterious. I suppose it’s something for hauling stone? Out of a quarry? But wait! What is that long hose thing that’s being held up by three little beige benches!? Mysteries abound!

J. I think it’s a run off from the plant into the hole. But I’m not really sure, I didn’t get any closer to the water it was creepy.

V. Yeah, looks kind of creepy and maybe dangerous to go out too close to the edge there.

J. The water was all frosty and glazed over but some times the color was a little odd. It was quiet like something might come bursting out of it and gobble you up.

V. Oh hoho. I know what you mean… That suspicious color that looks a little too chemical… might harbor some radioactive beastie with glowing tentacles…!

J. Yeah, exactly that odd color. Like the bright green lakes in the middle of nowhere… I’ll have to stop and take pictures the next time I see one of those. I think the home owners have made made lakes and add chemicals to them to keep the algae from growing. They are the oddest color.

V. Yeah, I think they have lots of those in Florida! Reminds me of a news snippet I saw about blue water pollution in China from blue-jeans factories… Hmmm…

J. Is the water the same color from the pollution or does it just tie in?

V. ust ties in, I guess. The water turns blue, like jeans…

J. And then when you start getting into colored jeans you get some really interesting stuff.

V. Mmm, yes… The “rainbow waters” of China. We could make a whole tourist trade out of it.

J. Ahahha, the new eight wonder of the word. Go for a swim and you might find yourself cured and able to walk again or you might find that you have a few extra feet and three legs instead of two. It’s a gamble and so many people would go for it.

This conversation was conducted on DeviantArt between my friend vanilla-vanilla and myself krazysidhe. For it and other conversations feel free to hunt around, we hope you’ve enjoyed today’s installment.

V. Interesting view. Nobody around to witness… What was in the bins? Did you rummage through them? (I would have.)
Oh, wait there’s a pull-down fire alarm… Where’d everyone go?

J. Ones a recycling bin for paper and I think the other one was a trash can. There wasn’t much of anything in them. I just happened to go through there on a Saturday afternoon when no one was around. I really like the older buildings.

V. Yes, looks like a nice building. With nobody around, I probably would have peeked in the bins just to be sure they weren’t hiding any gremlins or anything.

J. I think the gremlins were playing around in the lecture all room with the swinging seats. After all they are about the size of a normal cat and they love to swing more then anything else. So when no one else is around they enjoy swinging on the seats in the lecture halls and most especially from the doors in the bathrooms.

V. Good time to be carrying your camera!!

J. Sploosh and there goes another one! Watch out here comes the next shower. And on another note today’s weather will be mostly sunny with a chance of randomly local showers, the ones that tend to fall in a two block radius inside. So remember folks don’t let that umbrella out of your sight.

V. Twilight Zone! Coincidentally, it’s been raining here in Santa Banana since the moment you posted this reply!

J. Hahaha, supposed to storm tomorrow night. It’ll be great. I got soaked in the last storm and it was brilliant.
Speaking of Twilight. On another note, I find it really quite amusing how many times I’ve seen the word ‘Twilight’ being used in naming things or in relation to things since the rise of the books. Yeah for advertising. ‘Midnight Twilight’, the prefect new tanning lotion. ‘Black Twilight’, the new perfect scent from Bath and Body works, get your own now! Hahah, there were more but I don’t remember them.

V. Hmmm, yes, that’s what happens when something gets popular: everyone jumps on the band wagon trying to ride the wave of coolness… Cool Twilight hemorrhoid cream anyone?

J. Now, that would be fantastic.

The second photograph has been edited by vanilla-vanilla. This conversation was carried out via DeviantArt, by my friend vanilla-vanilla and myself. Feel free to browse around this conversation and for others which may or may not appear here at a future date. I hope your day/evening is a good one.

Image Note: So, I couldn’t resist. I found this on my campus walk and well… It really rather does look like an Alien Egg, sitting on a stump just waiting to be hatched.

V. Wow! What a wonderful surprise it will be when it hatches! (Or maybe we don’t want to be hanging around?)

J. *sits on the ground in front of it and starts changing* Hatch, Hatch, Hatch, Hatch, Hatch, Hatch…

V. Yes, chant hard… But don’t sit too close!

J. I think I shall beat my hands on my knees and make faces at it.

V. Oh! In my crystal ball, I see… an indie film. The Dangerous Pastimes of Weavers… Make sure it doesn’t have a mother lurking in the trees.

J. With numerous musical numbers and really bad subtitles as of course the whole thing is in French.

V. Ah, lovely. Sounds like my kind of film, sort of…

J. It has potential but will it be realized or not? That remains to be seen.

V. Maybe someday a movie poster might be made, though…

J. What comes to mind is old school cover art for books or pulp fiction magazines. ^^:

This conversation was carried out via DeviantArt, by my friend vanilla-vanilla and myself. Feel free to browse around this conversation and for others which may or may not appear here at a future date. I hope your day/evening is a good one.

The Dreaded Human Addiction

V. Something lurking down there, but can’t quite tell what it is… Oh, wait! It’s moving!

J. Slowly inching it’s way beneath the snow…. it’s the river monster attempting in vain to escape from the confines of the river, to breath out while there is snow upon the ground because only then can he walk on dry earth. The snow creates a buffer layer between him and the cruel water sucking earth that would normally be fatal!

V. Getting ready to pounce, I’m sure! Or is he just dying for someone to read him a story?

J. That story was just so good, it made me so hungry that… well, I just couldn’t resist a little nibble and after a nibble, well you might as well go for the mouthful.

V. Exactly, that’s how monsters succumb to “human addiction”.

J. Ah yes the dreaded ”human addiction”, it is afflicting more and more creak monsters of late. Their natural food supply is simply diminishing and the tasty but addictive human’s are growing more and more abundant giving the poor creak monster little opption.

V. Another instance of human encroachment on wildlife habitat! Well, at least humans are edible, eh…!? And if they’re also addictive, well, that’s a great bonus! Helps cut down the human population and feeds the creek monsters…)

J. Only perhaps then we might end up with an over abundance of creak monsters and then were would we be? When their hunger and their addiction gets so bad that they try and creep out of the creaks more? In the winder when it snows enough to allow them to travel farther and farther from the safety of the water? Mmmm and the down fall of the human race has been found.

V. When the city streets and parks are crawling with creek monsters! Aaagh!

J. Lions, Tigers and Creak Monsters! Oh My!

V. :)

This conversation was carried out via DeviantArt, by my friend vanilla-vanilla and myself. Feel free to browse around this conversation and for others which may or may not appear here at a future date. I hope your day/evening is a good one.

Creak Monster Munch 2

V. There’s that river monster again, just below the surface… This one also has a nice mood; I like the almost b/w quality.

J. Ah, but you know now the river monster doesn’t feel the need to break free because he can come up and breath whenever he wants to. So he’s not as restless as he is when the river is frozen over completely.

V. Tis the season where he loves to stick his neck out and stretch after a winter under the ice…

J. He’s like, “MMmm… I can just smell all that freedom and all those tasty hiker toes in their yummy stinky hiking boots… and I can’t wait to eats me some of those!”

V. Oh, I have a pair of hiking boots he can have… I’ll keep my feet, though!

J. There you go. Fishing for creak monsters by taking off your hiking boots and dangling them in the water instead of your toes. You are definitely one of the smarter hikers around.

V. Hopefully that’ll keep me out of the monster’s belly for another season.

This conversation was conducted on DeviantArt between my friend vanilla-vanilla and myself krazysidhe. For it and other conversations feel free to hunt around, we hope you’ve enjoyed today’s installment.

Image Note: Recycling bin at school for drink cans and bottles. Among other things… apparently.

V. Ha hah… What!? Hey, dudes, who’s drinking the hydrogen peroxide!

J. Hahaha, that’s what I wanted to know. Along with all the alcohol on campus? Though that probably came from an opening event at the gallery down stairs, it still amused me.

V. Mmm, yes. The new martini? 2 oz gin, 1 oz vermouth and a splash of hydrogen peroxide?

J. It’s quiet nice, I had one the other night. It has a wonderfully fizzy after taste that kind of lingers in your mouth like rabies. I was quiet sure that Mr. I.P. Freely over there was going to kill over the first time his date started foaming at the mouth, it was really quiet impressive.

V. Wow! “lingers in your mouth like rabies” OK, whew. I had to cover my mouth to keep from spewing tea all over the monitor…

J. *evil grins* I must admit I was rather proud of myself when that line came out. It just worked wonderfully. Just don’t ruin your monitor that would be rather sad.

V. Yup, it was a great moment. Almost makes me wish I had been too slow with the hand-mouth coordination so I could have taken a picture of the spewage to post.

J. That would rather be funny in a sad kind of why, I must admit I was drinking coffee when I read that… tough, luckily I didn’t get so bad.

V. Yes!

This conversation was conducted on DeviantArt between my friend vanilla-vanilla and myself krazysidhe. It has not been edited or altered from it’s original form. For this conversation and others feel free to hunt around or wait here for more, we hope you’ve enjoyed today’s installment.

V. Nice branches… Poor tree!

J. Makes a nice image against the snow though.

V. It does make a good image. Hope the bigger trunk part has some branches, too…

J. I think it’s probably dead, poor little thing. That was all of it there was. It’s one of those smaller trees in a fairly dense canopied area, that probably will not make it to maturity because it hast to fight too hard to reach up high enough to get to the sunlight through all of the other trees.

V. Too bad, but, it happens…

J. It does and that is why we have cannibalistic trees because they feed off the decaying bodies of the young that have been spawned by themselves and their neighbors… Now there is an interesting theory for how we might cut down on over population. Follow natures example…

V. Ah, yes. It would work very well… Following natures, example, Jonathan Swift, “A Modest Proposal”. Scroll down for example to: A child will make two dishes at an entertainment for friends, and when the family dines alone, the fore or hind quarter will make a reasonable dish, and seasoned with a little pepper or salt, will be very good boiled on the fourth day, especially in winter.

J. *chuckles* It has possibilities, though I suppose most would resort to cats and dogs first. Mmm Swift, I haven’t had to delve into that in a long while.

V. Mmm, we could make a 3-meat stew! I’ll bet that would sell.

J. Soup of the day ABCD!
A Baby, Cat and Dog Soup.
Just $2.99 A Bowl.

V. Wow! A bowl of 3-meat soup for under $3! Yay!

J. I know. That’s what you get when you use cat and dog, though I suppose baby might up the price some…

V. !! Yes! Maybe that’s why it’s not $2.95…

J. Yes, those special four pennies added onto the end. Little do people know that they are actually the very secret intermediate that adds magic to our soup. We very carefully take those last four penny’s and we add them to the tithe that we pay to hell. The one that allows us to add little baby’s and defenseless animals to our soup without fearing four our souls. Instead we just put everyone else in jeopardy but FEEDING it to you. Mwahahaha!

V. Oh, wow! I’m seriously laughing all over… I love it! :rose: (Hmm, maybe someday 3-meat soup will appear in a deviation… “For only four cents, we throw in the baby, and you can take the bath-water home!”)

J. It’s guaranteed to cure all manor of allurements from the common cold to crabs and maybe even aids. Would you like to try some bath water now? Just remember you can not guarantee that your soul will survive in one piece.

V. Ah, yes…

This conversation in all it’s glory and others took place over here, between vanilla-vanilla and myself. It has not in any way been edited for grammar or content but left as it originally appeared.

V. You know it’s lurking there, ready to grab any stray boots!

J. MUNCH!

V. Aaaagh! My $200 dollar boot! [dives in to retrieve the expensive snack…]

J. Do you make an even more expensive snack? How does your life compare in value to the half of a pair of $200 dollar boots?

V. Ah, OK, it took a couple of days to do the tally, and the verdict is… The boots are the most expensive part!

J. I don’t know i would think that the feet are rather more irreplaceable then the boots.

V. Turns out, however, that I have magical feet that keep growing back after being chewed off. Only they always grow back in pairs, so I always have an odd number of feet. This week it’s 7. I suppose I could even them out by having two chewed off at once, but that would still be odd.

J. Hahahah! Next time you should try and hand and see what happens with that. You may magically end up with an extra pair of helping hands for the trouble.

V. Ooh! Yes, then I’d have 7 feet and 4 hands, which would be a trifle odd…

J. Aye, it would be rather odd; however, it could be mighty useful as well, or they might just get in the way… I wonder if you could roll around on seven feet instead of walking. You’d probably end up going in circles and looking like a deformed clown balloon.

V. Wow! I’d almost like to try that, but people might be a little hesitant to approach me…

J. Ah but they would be so shocked and amazed by what you can do that their mouths would drop open all the way to the ground and their eyes would get big and round like dinner plates. Then you could roll up to them and go ‘Boo’ in a very small voice and they would fall over backwards. Thus you could approach them because they’d be in awe and unable to run away.

V. That would be quite a social advantage!

J. Not to mention always having a helping hand when you need it.

V. And helping feet, too. I would be a one-man dance team. Play two pipe organs at once.

J. You’d be a really great tap dancer and just imagine what you could do to the piano. I saw a duet one time that was two guys playing the piano at once, that was really neat.

V. Oh, yeah! Wow, I’d be like Fred Astaire, squared! Oh, and the piano… I’d be able to play all of the Schubert “piano, four hands” literature on my own… [Not sure if you know, but there’s a whole genre of piano music for two people at one piano; it was popular in the days when people had pianos in their parlors and everyone knew how to play, so married couples and sweethearts often played such pieces, I think…]

J. I actually didn’t know anything about that. But, I found that there was something very moving about watching two people playing together. There was something beautiful about it, even more then the dance piece that was going on—which wasn’t overly inspiring.

This conversation in it’s entirety took place here and was conducted by vanilla-vanilla and myself along with a number of others that may eventually find their way here.

V. A giant comb, and… Ooh, wait! What’s that!? One ultra-rare photograph of picnic tables mating… :-) Wow, do they allow this stuff on DA?

J. I don’t know. I think might have to put up a mature content warning on this one. I hadn’t thought of that until you said something. Amazing, I captured that moment without seeing the obvious… I wonder how big we can blow up the image, print it and plaster it around campus. Everyone will be totally amazed! They won’t know what hit them. Heheheheheh!

V. Great idea! Won’t the faculty be surprised…

J. Unfortunately, I’m afraid we might have to include diagrams to that people truly understand what is going on. Other wise they just might miss the awesomeness of the moment and that would really be sad.


V. Ah, yes, must include the detailed, educational diagrams without which any discussion of other-species mating rituals is so incomplete.

J. People get so bogged down in the details that they can not truly comprehend… after all most do still firmly believe that such objects are inanimate and thus incapable of such actions. That, I know a great many people when faced with such a truth have not been able to handle it.

V. But now, with your photos and diagrams, and the video out there on the net, they’ll just have to believe! It’ll open a whole new world.

J. And then no one will ever believe that I managed to do anything else with my life in the future. Because all they will remember is mating pick nick tables.

V. Oh, yes! You do not want to be one of those authors/artists who do one really big thing and then everyone forgets that they ever did anything else. Like Carl Orff. J.D. Salinger. Harper Lee. Pachelbel… ;-) So, I agree. Better to bury the mating tables, and let someone “discover” it after you’re gone. Then people will say, “Wow, that J did all of that and this fabulous undiscovered work, too!”

J. Of course then there is the risk that they will somehow try and name this variety of mating pick nick tables after you and that can be a rather scary thought as well.

V. ! :lmao: Oh, yeah! But that could be lovely, couldn’t it? Doesn’t every woman want to have a species named after her? ;-) (Hmm, OK, you have to wonder about guys who name gross little parasitic worms after their wives and stuff… I mean, a species of flower is one thing, but.)

J. “Honey, I’m home.”
Kiss, kiss, “Welcome home, sweatheart. What did you do today?”
“Well… I got a surprise.”
“Oh, what is it?”
“Here,” Hands a photo.
“Mmmm… and what is this little wormy thing?” Tries to sound polite and interested.
“That my dear, is the new species I named after you today. Isn’t it great,” Pulls out a wad of papers from his pocket, “See, I have a certificate of authenticity and everything. You my lovely are looking at the new form of fungus, the Mildred. Or as I call her Milly for short.”
Btw, on a side note these things are cool [link].

V. Yes! Exactly! The next frame is where she beans him with a frying pan! “Is that all I mean to you?” :crying: “Frank’s wife got a new rodent named after her…”
And those fungi! Ooh, they look so incredibly ALIEN! Wow! And to think some of them are only
down the road from Santa Banana. I might be able to see some in real life.

J. Poor Bob, he just couldn’t do much to please Mildred… besides it would’ve served her right to have a rodent named after her. Frank’s wife was much to pretty to be named after a rodent but ahhh a fungi. She would make a beautiful one.
I know aren’t they.

V. LOL, she would make a beautiful fungus…!

J. Fungi just have so much more class then those stinky pooping and eating little rodents.

V. LOL…!

This conversation in it’s entirety took place over here, and it was conducted between vanilla-vanilla and myself.